Even if it were… It’d not be you

Even if you were the only person left in the world, I wouldn’t tell u of my death nor look for you in my death bed.

I might lose my legs and even my arms but even so you’re still the last person in the world I’d look for.

Get over yourself, I talked to you cause I needed to jump over that hurdle of my life.

Don’t be so full of yourself, you are just one of the 7.3 billion humans living on this planet.

You’ve given me as much as you have taken but I still don’t call it even for people like you don’t deserve a break, well just not yet.

Good night.

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It’s in my head

It’s been a while since I’ve been happy.

It’s been a while since I’ve been sad.

It’s been a while since I have felt practically anything.

Yet I have seen flowers grow, I’ve seen them die, and I’ve watched seasons pass by…

Don’t worry, I felt something yesterday but don’t smile just yet or feel relieved. Those same nightmarish feelings from Highschool came back to life thanks to people close to me.

One thing I’ve learned is that it’s only the people you know that can make you feel like crap and bring you down.

Not some stranger, not your enemies but your friends.

I know life is tough, and I know I gotta deal with it and I know I’m supposed to act like an adult cause I’m 19… but I never got a chance to act like spoiled brat to begin with.. so when do I get to do that? When is my turn to let my shoulders relax and just be myself for a change instead of always carrying all them responsibilities and expectations? When do I get to… oh wait. I forgot. my anxiety. so that answers my question with a never.

All those what ifs and all those what will they says in my head and all those scenarios are a part of my daily life. Trust me when I tell you it’s hard to find me carefree.

Anyways, one thing I learned today about myself! It makes me extremely happy to make someone else happy and make them feel good about themselves so that’s great 😊

Anyways, It’s almost 2am but I had to get this off of my chest 😊

Goodnight, hope you all have a splendid day. Keep telling yourself it’ll be over soon and you might manage to get through it in no time. Sweet dreams.

Bye,

Rafia Rowshni

24 hours is all

– Everyday you can learn something new –

   With the help of many people and many small steps, you can change your circumstances and your perception about your day. It’s all about being brave and stepping out of one’s comfort zone.

More lost than ever and freaking out on the inside with my Anxiety, we walked inside. While Food trucks were getting set up in all directions in this extremely hot weather, we looked for the washroom to change into our F.C.S shirts.

Unfortunate for us we got stationed to the kids section, no one ever showed up and all we did was sit and enjoy the breeze and view. Looking at the ocean is an hour away from reality and feeling its breeze brush brush past me and I was drowning in solace.

But that was it… the beach, that peaceful silence, the joy, the goofing around. that was it. only one day is what I got and Alhamdulillah I made it count.

Inspiration comes in may forms. You might be my next.

Take care,

Rafia

P.S. I met some really cool funny people

Facts about Me

Get to know me a little.

Name: Rafia Alam Rowshni

Age: 19

Nationality: Bangladeshi

Country I live in: The United Arab Emirates (since I was 8 months – if you were curious)

Languages I speak fluently: English & Bengali (Yes I don’t speak Arabic)

Languages I understand: Urdu/Hindi , English, Bengali and a little bit of Korean/Japanese

Currently A Student at Abu Dhabi University (ADU) –

Major: Bachelor’s of Science in Public Health (in my 3rd year)

Height: I am Short

I’m a book lover, I love coffee, I’m not a big fan of animals.

My favorite thing to do is eat chocolates and try out new desserts every now and then.

I enjoy writing. I am in the process of creating a book filled my poetry and publish it later.

Sleep deprived + Upset + Low energy = Overreacting, dramatic, mean, and don’t-know-what-she-is-saying me (NOTE: half or an hour later I regret my actions). I would rather sit alone when i am tired than engage in a conversation cause that is a critical time frame for me. I am not a nice person when i am tired.

I am a very fun person to be with when I am in a good/great mood.

I don’t do well in big crowds, especially if they are my friends. I can only handle maximum 3 people… I am not as extroverted as I look.

I can’t stand it when I see something wrong being done to someone.

I SUCK BIG TIME at Jokes, I am not over-exaggerating. I am very serious.

 

If you have anymore question. Feel free to ask, I am open to anything appropriate.

~ Good Night

Sincerity?

Sincerity?

   When it comes to doing something for the good of people, how sincere are you? Do you do it for Social Media? Do you do it because it is your duty? or do you to it because you want to do it?

If your answer is the 3rd then I am sure you work hard till the last minutes to get it right so it is successful, be it an event or project submission or work.

I believe if you are sincere with what you want to do, then you can handle the criticism you receive and use the time  left to use those criticisms at your advantage.

I know, criticism gets to all of our nerves at some point, but keep in mind only accept criticism from those who mean well of you not from those who only look for reasons to bring you down.

It’s hard to be honest in this world, but I am going to take a step closer to an honest world by speaking up if I see someone being wronged in front of me. Yes I am a girl, but I’m a human First and A human should always look out for their fellow human when things are not right.

I’ve got a long day tomorrow since I’ll be volunteering at The Health Fitness & Fun Festival tomorrow. Good Night, Sweet Dream and Sleep Well..

Love & Hugs,

Rafia

The Only Flower in Winter

Like the only flower in winter, I stand proud;

I am known to be wiser than any of the spring flowers in the yard.

They think I have a huge ego but I don’t,

I stand here only with the intention to help.

They bother me with their chatters behind my back;

I am alone enough so why don’t you cut me some slack?

It is hard enough to stand alone in this yard during winter,

No flowers awake, no children outside and no warmth to spare.

I envy those who have people who’ve got their back, but hate those who have complaints in-spite of that.

There are unfortunates in a more worse position out there than you, don’t be selfish will you?

Give people a hand, it might surprise you to know that kindness is not one-sided.

Good Night, 

Rafia

 

Read to Discover

I was sitting by the steps with “The Strange and Beautiful Sorrows of Ava Lavender” by Leslye Walton and a cup of hot Mocha watching the rain and smelling the sweetness of wrath when it hit me.

I was thinking of How every time I start a new book, half way through I take a break from it for a month. Sometimes because I love the book too much and I can’t stand it coming to an end. But sometimes because I need some space to come back to reality.

This is when I realized I apply this to my life as well, when things seem to be either getting out of hand or reality becomes to seem unrealistic, I take a break from the world and zone out to my dark pit and stay there for a while until I can get back to being cheery, hardworking self.

Now I feel like I am not normal but Isn’t that okay? After all, we are ‘one of a kind’ and we were all born an original, there is no one like us out their but just maybe someone that compliments us in a weird way. 😛

Any how, My semester has start so I’m back to working on assignments and volunteering, been extremely busy. Its been drizzling where I am from and I heard that there was a snowstorm in the UK yesterday (we don’t get snow) so I hope you are safe, if you are from the UK.

Take care lads.

Until next time,

Au revior.